Cinderella

I'm clearly still learning heaps in French, even though I should be smug with a French/German degree already under my belt. Today I had my little girl's fantasy crushed. Cinderella didn't lose her glass slipper, she actually lost a squirrel fur shoe. How's that for a smack of reality? The 'pantoufle de vair' has been timelessly  mistranslated. 


What young girl didn't imagine her Prince Charming chasing after her clutching a dainty (size 4/5) glass slipper? Maybe I was a really impressionable child, I want to pay my thanks to Disney for that. ( Note : Mermaids are an exception to this rule) So Cinderella coldheartedly donned a pair of her dead pet's fur as shoes to the ball, what a peculiar outfit that must have been. Blates a colossal size 7 too. I hope it was really bloody cold, so as to justify such a fashion faux pas.


I like shoes. These ones in particular at the moment.

Toshop Patti

All eyes on you

Despite my homeland being the CCTV capital of the world, I have never up until now felt that I was being watched. In England cameras are live at every level, be it a curse or a blessing. Guadeloupe does not believe in such a system. Rather than the cameras and their red blinking eyes, here we have Guadeloupean men. Poised and staring from every angle. 

Unlike the discreet wink of red bulb, the men here do not hesitate in their attempts to blind you.  At a house warming party just recently I was 'enlightened' by a Gwad. He explained the story of his upbringing, and how his eleven siblings from six different mothers and the same father, were all down to genetics. Apparently his father's inability to keep it in his pants is a genetic problem! And the poor brothers, how they suffer! One indulged me in his philosophy, to live life just for himself and nobody else. A great idea in theory I guess, but in practice a lot harder to live by without constantly being reminded of the consequences. Here - eleven children to support. This genetic 'disorder' is no doubt aggravated by the brothers' charm and their smiles that would make even the most sensible of girls throw caution to the wind.

Living in Guadeloupe has been my first experience living as a minority; it has given me a renewed respect for people of colour facing problems here in England. At least 80% of the Guadeloupean population is of Black or Indian descent creating a veritable cultural melting pot in the middle of the Caribbean sea. Whilst some Guadeloupean cling on to a certain bitterness towards the white French holidaymakers, who are still viewed as the money splurging colonists, others are a tad more welcoming. As a tall, ginger, English speaking white girl I was often met with very puzzled looks.

As I become accustomed to all eyes on me. Perhaps you should ask yourself who is watching you?

The Diving Bell

I am growing increasingly frustrated that I cannot dip my head into the refreshingly blue Caribbean waters. Due to an ongoing ear drama (between myself, Dr Toh and the drum) I am forbidden from getting my right ear wet. Whilst my left ear is pretty much free to dip in and out of the water as she pleases, my right ear is constantly held above water. Like a badly behaving child relegated to the naughty corner my ear is out of action; sadly there are no arm band equivalents for a poorly ear.